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Jun 2, 2025 · 14 min read
Why Is It So Hard to Leave Abusive Relationships? (And What Can Be Done To Help?)
Why Is It So Hard to Leave Abusive Relationships? (And What Can Be Done To Help?) © 2025 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. “Why didn’t you just leave?” is one of the…
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May 2, 2025 · 7 min read
AI and the BIFF Response®: Who Writes Your Emails?
AI and the BIFF Response® Who Should Write Your Emails, Texts, and Letters? © 2025 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. As the Director of Innovation for the High Conflict…
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May 1, 2025 · 9 min read
Violence and Mental Health
© 2022 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, JDWe live in an age of overlap between legal and mental health problems. It is frequently said that there are more people with…
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Apr 2, 2025 · 9 min read
Responding to the “Bully’s Story” in Families, at Work, in Court, or Anywhere
Responding to the “Bully’s Story”in Families, at Work, in Court, or Anywhere © 2025 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. One of the main differences between child bullies…
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Mar 4, 2025 · 25 min read
Personality Disorder Discrimination by Mediators: A Rebuttal
Rebuttal to the Article: “ENDING THE EPIDEMIC OF ACCIDENTALPERSONALITY DISORDER DISCRIMINATION BY WELL-MEANING MEDIATORS”[1] © 2025 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.[2]…
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Feb 5, 2025 · 10 min read
Recognizing True and False Allegations of Abuse
Recognizing True and False Allegations of Abuse © 2025 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. High conflict situations—whether in families, at work, in communities, or…
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Jan 2, 2025 · 9 min read
Negative Advocates: How They (We) Become Emotionally Hooked
Negative Advocates: How They (We) Become Emotionally Hooked © 2025 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. High conflict disputes usually involve one or more people with a…
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Dec 16, 2024 · 5 min read
Unlock Your Inner Peacemaker by Accessing Your Calm Self
Unlock Your Inner Peacemaker by Accessing Your Calm Self © 2024 by Cherolyn Knapp, B.Comm, LLB.B, Q.Med We've all experienced those moments when emotions take…
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Dec 3, 2024 · 12 min read
Protecting the Elderly in Our New World of Adult Bullies
Protecting the Elderly in Our New World of Adult Bullies © 2024 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. In this holiday season, there is much family joy to go around as we…
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Nov 6, 2024 · 8 min read
Fostering Flexibility: Tips for developing flexible thinking skills
Fostering Flexibility: Tips for developing flexible thinking skills © 2024 by Cherolyn Knapp, B.Comm, LLB.B, Q.Med Do you ever have to interact with someone…
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Nov 4, 2024 · 11 min read
Are We Being too Nice with High Conflict Behavior?
Are We Being too Nice with High Conflict Behavior? © 2024 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Most professionals are nice people committed to helping their clients and…
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Oct 9, 2024
Abandon Abstraction: A Practical Approach to Changing Difficult Behavior
Abandon Abstraction: A Practical Approach to Changing Difficult Behavior © 2024 by Cherolyn Knapp, B.Comm, LLB.B, Q.Med You’re a leader who has to deal with…
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Sep 23, 2024
How to Avoid Getting Hooked by High Conflict Behavior
High-conflict behavior has an intensity that grabs your attention and pulls you in. Learn to recognize the hooks and stay calm and in control.
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Sep 1, 2024
Reducing Polarization in Divorce and Custody Cases: 7 Modest Proposals
Reducing Polarization in Divorce and Custody Cases:7 Modest Proposals © 2024 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Divorce and child custody decisions are based on the…
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Jul 10, 2024 · 8 min read
Is Total Freedom the Goal?
Setting Boundaries: Is Total Freedom the Goal? © 2024 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Setting Boundaries in Relationships at Home, at Work and Online As we celebrate…
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Jun 14, 2024 · 6 min read
How Adult Bullies Find and Encourage Each Other on Social Media
How Adult Bullies Find and Encourage Each Other on Social Media © 2024 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Adult bullies have traditionally been kept on the fringes of…
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Jun 14, 2024 · 6 min read
Turning the Tide on Toxic Teams: Introducing New Ways for Work®—Leaders Training
Turning the Tide on Toxic Teams: Introducing New Ways for Work®—Leaders Course © 2024 by Cherolyn Knapp, B. Comm, Q.Med Have you ever found yourself leading a…
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Jun 14, 2024
The Dangerous Bias in Fabulous Reports
The Dangerous Bias in Fabulous Reports © 2024 Jenni McBride McNamara, LMFT, PC Intro from Bill Eddy This month we have a great article about how to write…
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May 21, 2024 · 10 min read
SLIC Solutions: Setting Limits and Imposing Consequences in 2 ½ Steps
SLIC Solutions: Setting Limits and Imposing Consequences in 2 ½ Steps © 2024 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD We live in a rapidly changing world, with rules and…
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May 14, 2024
Microbiome and “Gut Feeling” in High Conflict Behavior
Microbiome and “Gut Feeling” in High Conflict Behavior © 2024 by Ekaterina Ricci, MDR The relationship between mental disorders and gut microbiome has become a…
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Apr 22, 2024
Domestic Violence and Personality Disorders: What’s the Connection?
Domestic Violence and Personality Disorders: What’s the Connection? © 2024 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. When I first had clients who were victim/survivors of…
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Jun 28, 2023
Foreword: The High Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Foreword from The High Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide by Megan Hunter and Andrea LaRochelleWhen I started reading The…
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Aug 13, 2019
HCPs and Violence
©2019 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Recent news of mass shootings has made everyone more anxious and fearful that it could, in fact, “happen here.” The search is on for…
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Jul 17, 2019
Writing BIFF Responses to High Conflict People When You Don’t Feel Like It
©2019 Megan Hunter, MBAReceiving an email, text or letter can put a dent in your day when it contains a zinger. It can get right under your skin and ruin your…
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Apr 16, 2019
Narcissist in Your Family? 4 Tips for Dealing with Them
<p style="white-space:pre-wrap;">According to the DSM-5 manual of mental disorders, up to 6% of the adult population in the United States may have a narcissistic personality disorder. That’s about 20 million people. Chances are good that you or someone you know may be married to a narcissist, the son or daughter of a narcissist, the parent of a narcissist, or a sibling or a cousin. If so, you know that it can be very hard to cope with their constant criticisms, arrogant statements, preoccupation with themselves, disparaging remarks, and demands for admiration. Not only does this get tiresome, it can also wear down your own self-esteem, be exhausting, and absorb a huge amount of your time with nothing received in return. This article gives some suggestions for how you can deal with them without getting stuck in the mud or disliking yourself.</p>
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Feb 19, 2019
Walls, Wars and Parades: Understanding Narcissistic Leaders
©2019 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. WALLS: Dividing people into winners and losers.WARS: Highly defensive, the slightest criticism may send them into battle.PARADES:…
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Dec 10, 2018
Narcissism and Incivility: Is There a Connection?
©2018 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Did you ever wonder where incivility comes from? Is it always what someone else is doing? It seems to have spread far and wide over…
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Nov 14, 2018
Handling High Conflict Situations During the Holidays
©2018 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Holidays at any time of year can be a time of fun and visiting with family and friends. But it also can be a combustible mix of…
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Oct 10, 2018
Sociopaths and their Deceptions
<p style="white-space: pre-wrap;">Sociopaths, also known as those with antisocial personality disorder (ASPD), are some of the most dangerous and deceptive people you will ever know. Yet they also can be some of the most charming. That’s why they are often known as “con artists.” In this article I will give some of the basics of understanding sociopaths, including how they may deceive people in legal disputes. </p>
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Jul 22, 2018
Spotting Dangerous Clients in 3 Steps
©2018 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Family law professionals were shaken to the core by the murders of 6 people by an angry ex-husband in Arizona.The victims included…
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Apr 17, 2018
Vicarious Trauma: 3 Tips and Review of the book "Second-Hand Shock"
©2018 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Our High Conflict Institute speakers give seminars around the world to helping professionals (lawyers, judges, counselors,…
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Feb 15, 2018
How to Spot High Conflict People (before it's too late to avoid them)
©2018 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.High-conflict people (HCPs) have high-conflict personalities. This means they have an ongoing pattern of all-or-nothing thinking,…
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Feb 3, 2018
Anybody You Know? Predictable Characteristics of High Conflict People
©2018 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. For the past twenty years I have been studying and teaching about high-conflict people (HCPs) and how to manage them in legal…
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Nov 6, 2017
Tips on Offering Mediation to a High Conflict Employee
©2017 Michael Lomax, JDImagine you are a manager, and you have a supervisor who reports to you who is dealing with an employee with high conflict traits. There…
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Sep 28, 2017
Family Law: 3 Theories of the High-Conflict Case
Family Law: 3 Theories of the High-Conflict Case©2017 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.I do a lot of consulting to family lawyers and their clients (often on the phone…
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Aug 28, 2017
Differences in Dealing with Borderline, Narcissistic and Antisocial Clients in Family Law
Differences in Dealing with Borderline, Narcissistic and Antisocial Clients in Family Law©2017 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.By now, most family law professionals know…
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May 31, 2017
Structure, Skills & Less Stress: How Courts Can Provide Structure for Learning New Skills
Excerpt from The Future of Family Court: Structure, Skills and Less Stress, Chapter 3: Structure & Accountability, by Bill Eddy, LCSW ESQStructure, Skills &…
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Apr 18, 2017
When Helping Hurts - How Professionals Become Negative Advocates - Or Not
©2017 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Most professionals are helping professionals. We like to help our clients as lawyers, mediators, therapists, arbitrators, social…
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Jan 19, 2017
How to Reply to Angry Texts & Emails – 5 BIFF Response® Examples
©2017 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Dealing with High Conflict People and their irate communications can leave you at a loss for words. The BIFF Response® Method helps…
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Oct 10, 2016
High Conflict Personalities in Employment Cases
©2016 John C. Edwards, Esq.It is expected and understood by most people in the legal profession that because of the intensely personal nature of the issues…
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Sep 29, 2016
Narcissists as Leaders: Good or Bad for Your Organization?
©2013 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Whether in business, politics or workgroups, there is a natural tendency to select narcissistic leaders. They are attracted to…
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Sep 5, 2016
3 Do’s and Don’ts to Manage High-Conflict People at Work
©2016 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. & L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW Dealing with high conflict people (HCPs) in the workplace presents a variety of challenges. The good…
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Aug 15, 2016
Fire or Keep High-Conflict Employees?
©2016 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. & L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSWFor the past several years, dealing with difficult co-workers has been at the top of employee and…
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Jul 6, 2016
6 Ways You Should Be Assertive in Family Court
© 2016 Bill Eddy, LCSW, EsqFamily court presents a difficult dilemma for reasonable people. If you act reasonably and use the cooperative problem-solving…
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Apr 10, 2016
7 Steps to Tackle Organizational “Splitting”
7 Steps to Tackle Organizational “Splitting”Why it happens. What you can do.© 2016 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW Organizational splitting…
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Nov 11, 2015
New Ways for Work®: A New Coaching Method
© 2015 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. & L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW High Conflict Institute offers a brand-new coaching method for managing difficult employees and…
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Aug 12, 2015
Narcissists As Leaders
© 2015 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and Georgi DiStefano, LCSW[Excerpt from Chapter 3 of the Axiom award-winning book It’s All Your Fault at Work: Managing…
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Apr 8, 2015
Are High Conflict People Ruining Your Business?
© 2015 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. & L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW[Originally published by Capital Business, a subsidiary of the Washington Post, in March 2015]Are…
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Jan 20, 2015
Setting the Agenda (For Meetings That Include Potentially High-Conflict People)
© 2015 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSWWhether you are a manager developing the agenda for a team meeting, a mediator or lawyer setting…
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Jan 15, 2015
Why They Don’t Get It?
Why Don't They Get It?© 2015 By L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW and Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.It’s so aggravating! No matter what you say or do, that certain employee is…
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Jan 13, 2015 · 4 min read
What Baseball Can Teach Us At Work
© 2015 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSWAs both therapists and attorney, we have spoken with hundreds of clients over the years. From…
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Oct 22, 2014
Should I Just Let Go?
© 2014 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.This blog is dedicated to coping with difficult communications and High-Conflict People. All too often, parents get caught up in…
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Sep 17, 2014 · 6 min read
Hiring a Divorce Lawyer Who Understands High Conflict
©2014 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Excerpt from Chapter 7: Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality…
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Sep 3, 2014
Living with a Histrionic Personality: Do’s and Don’ts
Theatrical, dramatic, exaggerated — recognize histrionic personality patterns and learn practical do's and don'ts for living with one, from Bill Eddy.
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Aug 29, 2014
Living with an Antisocial Personality: Do’s and Don’ts
© 2014 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.You can learn to coexist with a person with an Antisocial High Conflict Personality by following these and other tips. HAVE YOU…
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Aug 21, 2014
Do's and Don'ts for Living with a Borderline
© 2014 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. You can learn to coexist with a person with a Borderline High Conflict Personality by following these and other tips. DO YOU…
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Aug 12, 2014
Do's and Don'ts for Living with a Narcissist
© 2014 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.You can learn to coexist with a Narcissist by following these and other tips.ARE YOU INVOLVED WITH THIS PERSON?Comes off as…
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Aug 6, 2014
Quick Tips for Controlling Communications with a Hostile Ex
© 2914 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Divorce, separation or ending any relationship is tough. It just plain hurts and it can be hard to eat, sleep, work or focus. If…
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Oct 29, 2013
Workplace Bullying – Against the Law?
© 2013 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. When I was recently in Australia, I had the opportunity to give a seminar in Canberra (the nation’s capital) about the dynamics…
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Jun 20, 2013
Skills Before Decisions: Can Difficult Clients Learn Decision-Making Skills?
© 2013 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.This article proposes some solutions to recent concerns raised by family lawyers, counselors, mediators and judges. How do we…
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Dec 22, 2012 · 3 min read
How to Survive the Holidays with an Antisocial Relative
© 2012 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.[excerpted from It's All Your Fault! by Bill Eddy] Don’t Get ConnedWhile Antisocial “Con Artists” are the best at lying and…
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Dec 17, 2012
Prevent the Next Shooting: Focus on the Youth Deficit!
© 2012 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.I have tremendous empathy for the children, parents, teachers and staff at the Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, CT. They…
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Aug 28, 2012 · 9 min read
Splitting at Work: How High-Conflict People Divide Teams
How high-conflict colleagues split workplaces into 'allies' and 'enemies' — and what managers and HR can do to stop the damage. From Bill Eddy.
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Jul 4, 2012
It’s All Your Fault – At Work!
© 2012 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Have you noticed more people engaging in “high conflict” behavior these days at work? A customer in a store yells loudly at a…
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May 21, 2012 · 6 min read
Conclusion on a Shared Parenting Presumption
Bill Eddy's conclusion on adopting a legal shared-parenting presumption, and what it means for resolving high-conflict child custody disputes.
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Jan 19, 2012
BIFFs for Business and Professions
© 2012 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.Excerpted from BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns…
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Oct 18, 2011
Building A Team Against The Problem
© 2011 Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Whether you are a manager, mediator, lawyer or other type of professional dispute resolver, one of the common problems you face…
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Sep 1, 2011
Incivility in the Workplace: A Growing Problem
© 2011 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Times have changed. Incivility is growing in the workplace, as well as in most areas of our society. How big of a problem is…
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Feb 1, 2011
Calming Upset People with EAR
© 2011 by Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD Everyone gets upset some of the time. High conflict people get upset a lot of the time. A simple technique called an EAR…
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Aug 2, 2010
Can Narcissists Share Parenting?
© 2010 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. In my last blog, I asked the same question about people with borderline personalities. Borderlines and narcissists seem to be…
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Feb 18, 2010
High Conflict People and Workplace Violence
© 2010 By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Now we have another workplace shooting incident to analyze. This one apparently by a female faculty member at the University of…
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Apr 20, 2009
Con Artists at Work on Wall Street
© 2009 Megan L. Hunter, MBA Reports of financial fraud on Wall Street causing losses in the millions for many Americans have been front and center recently.…
