Technique: Email/Text with a BIFF Response®
The go-to HCI tool for calming hostile written communication. In 20 minutes, learn the 4-step BIFF Response® method (Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm) and watch it turn blistering emails, texts, and posts into exchanges that end instead of escalate.
Your instructor
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.
Co-founder & Chief Innovation Officer, High Conflict Institute
500,000+
professionals trained worldwide
Hostile messages beg for the reply that makes everything worse.
When an email attacks your character, your competence, or your decisions, the instinct is to defend, correct, and counter. That reply becomes ammunition, and the thread grows. A BIFF Response® does the opposite: it answers with something Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm, gives the other person nothing to grab onto, and usually ends the exchange.
Outcomes you'll bring back from BIFF Response® (Email & Text).
- Write a BIFF Response® using the 4-step process.
- Recognize Blamespeak and stop rewarding it with reactions.
- Calm even the most volatile written hostility without giving ground.
- Keep replies brief so they end threads instead of feeding them.
- Stay friendly and firm at the same time (the combination that works).
- Coach clients, colleagues, and family members to write their own BIFF replies.
Who BIFF Response® (Email & Text) is built for.
Anyone With an Inbox
If hostile emails, texts, or posts land in your day, BIFF is the tool you'll reach for most.
Legal Professionals
Reply to hostile letters and emails without adding ammunition to the file.
Mental Health Professionals
Give clients a concrete skill for their most inflammatory relationships.
HR & Managers
Answer heated complaints and accusations in writing, calmly and defensibly.
Mediators & Coaches
Set a shared standard for written communication between parties.
Co-Parents & Families
Respond to a high-conflict co-parent or family member without feeding the fire.
How BIFF Response® (Email & Text) is delivered.
A focused 20-minute on-demand video: the 4-step process, worked examples of hostile messages and their BIFF rewrites, and how to check a draft before you hit send.
- 20-minute video course — The complete BIFF method with worked examples of hostile messages and their BIFF rewrites.
- PowerPoint PDF — Downloadable slides to keep as a reference while you write.
- Certificate of Completion — Documentation you can keep on file.
Methods taught in BIFF Response® (Email & Text).
BIFF Response®
The 4-step written reply: Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm.
Blamespeak Recognition
How to spot attack language, and why reacting to it feeds the cycle.
BIFF Coaching
How to help someone else draft and check their own BIFF replies.
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. is the co-founder and Chief Innovation Officer of the High Conflict Institute. He pioneered the High Conflict Personality Theory (HCP) and is an international expert on managing disputes involving people with high-conflict personalities. He is the author or co-author of more than 25 books, manuals, and workbooks, co-host of the podcast It's All Your Fault!, and writes a Psychology Today blog with millions of views.
Before co-founding HCI, Bill was the Senior Family Mediator at the National Conflict Resolution Center for 15 years, a Certified Family Law Specialist lawyer representing clients in family court for 15 years, and a licensed clinical social worker therapist with twelve years of experience. He has served on the faculty of the Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution at Pepperdine University School of Law, taught as a Conjoint Associate Professor with the University of Newcastle Law School in Australia, and trained professionals in over 35 U.S. states and 13 countries.
BIFF Response® (Email & Text) — frequently asked questions.
Who is this course for?
I'm a lawyer. Is there a version for legal practice?
How do I access the course?
Is this legal or therapeutic advice?
Can our team or organization get this training together?
Ready to enroll?
Enroll an individual seat now, or talk to us about a private cohort designed around your organization's actual cases.
